Tuesday 3 May 2016

There is no room left...

... in my head.  Honest to goodness, I do not know what is going on.  I have become one of those bores.  I am sick of constantly being busy.   I feel like the rabbit from Alice in Wonderland, "I'm late, I'm late for a very important date!".

What am I doing all the time?  I have no idea.  Things are getting done, but I decided as I came back from the supermarket at 9.30pm that enough is enough.  I am starting to say no to things, starting tomorrow morning.

I actually sat at work today, whilst two people argued over who was going to give me their work.  I already have my own work.  It is the weirdest place to be, completely surreal.  People arguing about you, whilst you sit there.  Fish mouth working, no sound coming out.  Very odd and really uncomfortable.  I must have looked like a fool.

No.  No.  And No.  What do you think?  Do you think I can do it?

I have already cried off of 2 dates over the next bank holiday.  I have things to do at home.  The building works start the week after, my lovely friends completely understand that I will be busy.  I said yes and then thought, heck really I should have said "No.  Sorry I cant."  Maybe when all of the works start on the house I will want to be out all the time.  The dust is bound to make me crazy again.

Late on Monday afternoon we zoomed off on a whim and bought a new Miele vacuum cleaner.  My old samsung is kaput.  And although I love my Dyson stick its charge is only 20 mins.  And when I get in a temper or in a mood I need to clean the hell out of the house.  Nothing is better than a really deep theraputic cleaning frenzy.

I am boring myself now.  I refuse to become one of those people who is constantly saying how busy they are.  I want a day where I sit and just read.  I miss that.  I love to read and comment on peoples blogs.  I am fed up of feeling rushed.  Completely out of control at the moment.  I have vacuumed the hell out of the hideous carpet in the hall, and you know what?  The vacuum is so powerful that it pulled the thread/pile out.  Now that is suction!  I struggled to push it over the surface.  It has different power settings and 4 different vacuuming heads, you know the ones that look like a hammer head shark.  My upright Dyson has had it.  Move over Dyson made in a far, far away land.  Your plastic has cracked and you no longer pick up.  My lovely German made Miele is now my new marvel.

None of this makes sense but I am sure someone else out there feels exactly the same as me.  I say, get out there and vacuum.  If I had a carpet beater and a big washing line I would thrash the hell out of the rugs.  And then I might just feel in control again.

And on that note, I bid you all Good Night.

P.S. dont you think the below vacuum cleaner looks like a droid?  R2D2's cousin?
Picture from here


Elaine said...

Sol, You need to step off the merry-go-round and get your breath back. Easier said than done, I know, but it is important.
I know what you mean about therapeutic cleaning, especially the vacuuming. I do it too, to work things out of my system. I've gone through 3 Dyson's in eight years. The suction is great but they are not robust enough for me, so thanks for telling us about this little beauty, it sounds just what I need.

Sol said...

Morning Fliss, you are completely right. Ive text my boss we have a meeting, i am a planner and this move into a new job where everyone lurches from one thing to another is not how i work. I think she already knew this.

to grapple back some sanity, i made up a load of falafel for our lunches, those with salad in lunch boxes with yoghurt will be yummy, but i also dont have to fuss every day with it. loads off carrot and celery sticks are also ready.

I dont really like it but Posh Boy is sorting out a weekly(?) order for food to be delivered, so i dont have to do the supermarket. When i am short of time we can book a time slot on the internet and the items in our favourites will arrive.

at the weekend my back up vacuum, the samsung we bought in the interim, whilst i looked at replacements for the dyson, went POP and i love a good clean. we therefore had to buy a new one

i hope this all reads ok i am writing this comment on my phone.

have a great day Fliss, have a lovely wander in your woods.

Dani said...

Sounds like you seriously need to take time to sop and smell the roses.

Not having the power to vacuum away for hours, I tend to sweep voraciously when necessary. Nothing like moving every piece of furniture to sweep behind / underneath to sort out my mood du jour...

Attila said...

When I worked as a cleaner, we had hoovers that looked like little droids and we called them R2D2, R2D3, R2D4 etc. or "R2" for short. As they were industrial cleaners they were very robust but one broke away from its carriage (bid for freedom?) and I was my boss's favourite person because I smiled sweetly at the factory people where I was working and they welded him together again. And, yes, we did call them "he"!

Sol said...

Hey Dani, I just needed to get a grip of myself. I couldnt continue. I dont do well with people who moan for weeks and do nothing about it or look for a solution. It drives me potty.

Hi Attila, my sister says I would be a very good cleaner, but my blood would boil if people messed in front of me. lol

kymber said...

dear Sol....ugh. as much as i would love for you to visit, you would have to sleep in a tent in the yard. i'll bring you food and we'll hang out together but there is so much cat hair and dust in my house....they've started grouping together and they all now have names. not to mention the snackedy-moes all over everything - snackedy moes are little cat treats and sometimes they want them here, or there, or on a table or somewhere else...and i am a big baby and can't make them eat the treats out of the 300 little bowls all over the house. and then there are the various water glasses all over the house, little glasses of water in every room because sometimes the cats want to drink water from this glass and sometimes from that glass. no way, lady - there is no way you are getting into my house.

and hon - it seems like you are overwhelmed. or feeling overwhelmed. i've been there and it sucks. i have no advice except to blow off steam here at your blog. you don't want to upset your family with venting because they are too close...but you have friends here who can help you...and none of us mind, based on the previous comments.

you need to step back, breathe a little, and try not to take on more than you can chew. easier said than done, i know. but you have friends from all around the world and we can all help you with advice, shoulders to lean on....and mermaid tails.

sending much love! your friend,

Sol said...

Hey Kymber, thank you for your kind words. Today went a whole lot better. I have lists made and a little rota that I am filling out. It is all an adjustment. My boss knew I was struggling and said to forge ahead as she is also new to the team and was brought in for this reason. Order and procedure.

I have a new desk next month. I am just not used to working with so many women. I think that is part of the problem. I am used to working on building sites in a porta cabin, mostly on my own. When there is a problem on site, they normally come and tell you. there maybe a bit of swearing, you conference call with an engineer. They argue a little bit, I call the project manager, tell them how much and they say yes or no. There maybe a call to a building supplier and its all done.

This is something completely different. Lots of people, all noisy talking. I am not adjusting well. After this contract I will try somewhere else. And if I am no good I will go back to building projects. I am good at it. I just wanted to try something new and see if I could have a new career path. I dont seem to do well with a lot of people around :(

Thank you again my Canadian Friend.

Harry Flashman said...

When I was still young and working , I often felt like that. Then I'd go out to the shop and reload for an hour or so, or go the firing range and hang out with cronies. It really helped to remember there was something other than work in life. Now I am retired, I do what I want, and I doff my cap to no one. Life is good!

Hang in there, Sol. Don't let stress take years off the end of your life. ;-)

Sol said...

Hi Harry, I was having a really bad day. I am struggling with the amount of people. I think there are too many people, i need to work for a smaller company. its all an adjustment

Elaine said...

Hi Sol, I hope life (and the building works) are not getting you down.

I took delivery of my new Miele - yes, I am a copy-cat - a couple of hours ago. After battling with a disintegrating Dyson, for months on end, I have spent the last couple of hours practically sucking the huge stone slabs up off the floor and wrestling rugs out of the mighty Miele.

Fabulous! Thanks for the information.

I just need to spend a few days cleaning and sorting my own house out and then I will be free to roam the countryside again.x

Sol said...

Hi Felicity, we love the miele. It is much better than our old dyson. The plastic became brittle and cracked, I dont know if this is just an upright problem? Once my house is sorted and clean, my mind is calm. It is like a noise to me. I clean is is quiet. Weird but true.

Have a great weekend!